What Is Motherhood Worth?

By now you’ve heard the news: the United States is part of a growing list of countries where the birth rate is in serious decline. While politicians and pundits propose solutions to incentivize motherhood, others, like one young woman who reached out to Revive Our Hearts recently, are asking a different question . . . why?

Grace, a student at a classical Christian high school, sent me a list of ten interview questions as she prepares to write a thesis on modern feminism and its effects on motherhood today. She proposes that “modern culture’s feminism has pushed the view that motherhood is an unnecessary burden to young women everywhere; however, as Christians, we ought to strive to foster a society in which men and women act according to their nature and women are encouraged to be mothers.”¹

Exactly, Grace! At Revive Our Hearts, we agree. Encouraging women to live and thrive within God’s design for their lives is a big part of our mission—and that includes helping them develop a biblical view of motherhood. 

As you read the questions and answers below, consider whether your thoughts on motherhood are being shaped by God’s Word. 

10 Questions on the State of Motherhood Today

1. What are your credentials?

I am a forty-five-year-old mother of six who married my high school sweetheart at a young age—I was a couple months shy of nineteen, and he was almost twenty-one. We have been married for nearly twenty-seven years. Professionally, I am a writer and editor who serves as Content Director at Revive Our Hearts. I have a bachelor’s degree in writing with a minor in political science from Northern Michigan University. 

2. What is your background regarding this topic (motherhood and feminism)?

While I was raised in a Christian home and considered myself politically conservative, I did not truly consider the implications of feminism in my life and worldview until after I was married and began having children. Through the ministry of my local church, Revive Our Hearts, and teaching from Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Mary Kassian, and others, I began to realize that the feminist mindset had indeed infiltrated my thinking. 

A message at True Woman ’08 was particularly impactful: “You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby” by Mary Kassian. In the message, Mary traces the rise of feminism from the late 1950s to the early 2000s and how, “in a few short decades, in the span of my lifetime, the ideal of a happy, fulfilled woman has gone from one who serves and exalts her children, her husband, and her community to one who serves and exalts herself and has a very different type of commitment, very different type of idea towards men and women.” 

I was shocked when I realized the extent to which the ideas offered by the feminist movement had been ingrained into my worldview, even though I would not have thought of myself as a feminist by any stretch of the imagination. 

3. What are the most important Scriptures that we can draw from regarding motherhood?

The Bible is full of instruction for mothers—both explicit, passages specifically related to motherhood; and implicit, passages and general principles that can be applied to the lives of women and motherhood. (Think of this as a sampler not an exhaustive list!) 

First (and perhaps most foundational) is the understanding that according to 2 Timothy 3:16–17, “All Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, for rebuking, for correcting, for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” This means that what the Bible says about womanhood and motherhood is true and that the general principles of Scripture can be accurately applied to the areas of womanhood and motherhood.

Proverbs 31 is the quintessentially quoted passage on biblical womanhood and is particularly helpful when we view it as descriptive rather than prescriptive. The thoughtful, industrious, purposeful, God-honoring ways that the woman depicted in Proverbs 31 cares for her husband, children, home, and community should be inspirational for Christian women without saddling them with undue pressure to live up to an impossible standard of perfection. 

Psalm 127:3 reminds us, “Sons are indeed a heritage from the LORD, offspring, a reward.” The way the heart of this passage is lived out can differ from family to family, but generally speaking, married women should welcome the idea of having children and view them as a gift from the Lord. As Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth has said, “Raising godly offspring is at the heart of God’s purpose for marriage, and it is His plan for passing the baton of faith on to the next generation.”

Finally, 2 Timothy 1:5 assures us that the influence of mothers and grandmothers upon subsequent generations is immense and that faith, passed down through generations and made personal in each individual’s heart through the work of the Holy Spirit, is indeed a worthwhile legacy. 

4. What are the key drivers behind women not aspiring to motherhood?

In the United States today, we are essentially turning the former “average American family” on its head: where it was once the norm for a family to have 2.1 children and one job, on the current trajectory, you’ll soon be more likely to find a family with 2.1 jobs and one child. This topic warrants more discussion than I can provide here, but the decline of the “family wage” (a job that would pay one individual—at that time usually a man—enough to support a whole family) after World War II has certainly been a factor. 

Put simply, most women today either feel that they have to or want to have a career outside of the home. And I can tell you from experience that being a family living on a single lower-middle class income is not for the faint of heart—and for many, nearly impossible. That doesn’t mean that women are no longer interested in being mothers, but it is far less likely to be something a woman actually aspires to.

And why would she? Young women today are rarely encouraged to pursue motherhood as anything other than the fulfillment of a desire that they may or may not have at some point in their lives. Motherhood is not seen as something that women were designed to do but as an entirely optional—sometimes accidental—interruption in the “regularly scheduled programming” of their lives. 

Bearing and raising children is often seen as anything from a burden to a personal pastime, with little support for the idea that homemaking is a legitimate vocation or that motherhood is as worthy of aspiration as an occupation—even within the Church.

5. Based on the known statistic regarding 2.4 as the average number of children per family, what do you think the ideal number of children is and why?

I have six children, so obviously I am in favor of large families, but I also understand that having many children is not an option for every family due to a variety of factors. As stated earlier, I do believe that married couples should be open to having children should the Lord allow them to do so and that every child is a blessing from Him. God certainly does not love those who have many children any more than those who have few or none, but He blesses faithful obedience to Him and His Word in all areas of life. And of course, with the “replacement rate” currently in the news, we’re reminded that God’s plan for procreation is indeed a good one, for both individual families and society at large. 

6. How has being a mother affected you and your lifestyle?

Getting married a year out of high school and having my first child at twenty-one afforded me the opportunity to grow up sooner than many of my peers. And while it probably eliminated a few “rite of passage” experiences for me, it also allowed me to experience the joy of essentially growing up alongside the love of my life. 

Because of those choices, I completed two years of college right after high school, then took a few years off to work and have our first two babies. Later, I went back to school as a twenty-five-year-old mother of two and finished my writing degree in two and a half years, graduating magna cum laude. After getting my degree, I had four more children and didn’t enter the workforce as a professional until my late thirties. While my path may not have been traditional, I have no regrets. Taking the time to have my children, spend time with them, and be available for them was an invaluable experience that shapes the way that I do my job today.

7. How does financial stability affect views on motherhood? Should we avoid having children because of this?

Scripture encourages us to use godly wisdom when making choices, and that includes financial decisions. For some (and as a couple’s consciences allow), this may mean delaying having children for a time while, for example, one spouse is completing his or her education. However, if couples wait until conditions are perfect (financially or otherwise) before having children, they will likely be waiting much longer . . . or never have children at all. 

Did having many children at a young age negatively affect my husband and I from a financial standpoint? Yes, of course. But does that mean that it should not be considered or even joyfully pursued? No. 

Sometimes it is simply a question of what we are willing to sacrifice. Fancy cars? A nicer house? Daily lattes? Luxurious vacations? Those who have children young or have large families will often forgo some of these things—but for us the trade-off has been more than worthwhile. 

8. How can we encourage women to value motherhood? Is there a definite solution to this issue?

There is a sense in which women need to be taught the value of womanhood in general and motherhood in particular—and that’s part of why our ministry exists. But in the end, whether we value motherhood is a heart issue like any other, and the only true solution is to get women into God’s Word and get God’s Word into women. Only when we hold up our culture’s lies next to biblical truth will hearts be changed from those that serve the self into those that serve the living God. 

The Church needs to encourage, support, and lift up motherhood rather than joining our culture in making stay-at-home moms feel “less than” and joining in on telling them the lie that you can have it all—a high profile career, two fancy cars in the garage, a beautiful home, two brilliant children and a dog—without sacrificing anything. There should be room for all working moms within the local church—those who work outside the home and those who work within it.

But first and foremost, men and women need to hear the gospel again and again and begin allowing God’s Word to take root in their hearts—to truly believe that what the Bible says is true and to follow Christ, whatever the cost. God created womanhood, so He gets to define it—and He made women to be life-givers, both in a physical and spiritual sense. 

9. What advice would you give to young women who don’t feel called to motherhood? Do you have any ways that you have learned to nurture outside of being a mother?

To a young woman who does not feel called to motherhood, I would say don’t close the door (or your heart) to having children, because you may find yourself changing your mind later. And frankly, we all do things we don’t feel called to every day! Most days, I don’t feel called to clean my house. I never feel called to take out the trash. Some days, I don’t even feel called to love my job. 

But I do these things because I can be obedient to and honor the Lord in doing them. So consider being obedient to the Lord by being open to having children, even if you don’t necessarily feel “called” to motherhood. It might turn out to be the sweetest gift you ever receive. 

Of course, women are not only called to be mothers in a general biological sense but in a spiritual sense as well. Mentoring younger women (formally or through simply walking through life together) is a great way to exercise your God-given calling to nurture life whether you are married or single, a biological mother or not. 

10. What would be the best way to approach questions about women’s callings to career-focused lives, who prioritize their job over a family life (not at all saying this is a bad calling)?

I spent fourteen years as an exclusively stay-at-home mom, and now that my kids are a little older, I’ve spent about eight years (to different degrees) as a working mom, so I have admiration for both positions. I think your key statement is that whether a mother works outside the home or not, the problem is when we prioritize our job over our family. It is possible to do both well, but it takes a lot of work to do both well. I fail at this regularly, and there’s grace for that too. 

But largely, these questions need to be answered by individual couples, with decisions carefully brought before the Lord in prayer. No matter what a couple decides, Scripture makes clear that . . . 

• Children are a blessing.
• The responsibility of raising and teaching children is on parents, not on the government or any other entity. We may choose to rely on others to help with this in varying degrees but primarily, the responsibility is ours. 
• The Lord will bless those who are humble and obey Him. The blessings may not always be physical or financial, but the decision to love, honor, and follow Him is one that He always stands ready to bless. 

Career Goals

You might find it hard to believe, but I was not a girl who dreamed about being a mom. When I walked down the driveway to the bus stop in fifth grade, I pretended I was on my way to the subway to go to work. But beyond my relationship with the Lord and my marriage, being a mother to my children has been the singular greatest blessing of my life. Whatever I have accomplished or will accomplish professionally pales in comparison to the privilege of late-night feedings, bandaging scraped knees, making endless peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, drying tears, and playing a part in molding young men and women into the people the Lord wants them to be. 

It’s a Mother’s Day gift that is truly priceless. 

The message of freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ is spreading far and wide—like a river that cannot be stopped. It’s reaching more women, leading them to thrive in Christ, and shaping lives for generations to come. Would you prayerfully join us in this work? We’d love to send you the 50 Promises to Live By Card Set this month as our thanks for your donation of any amount to help women thrive in Christ. May it be a constant reminder of God’s unchanging care for you. 

¹ Grace Clark, email correspondence, March 31, 2025.