How Do You Clear Relationships Anxiety?
I do not have to be an authority in relationships, to know that one of the ways to know who you should be with, is by knowing exactly who you are.
When you know the kind of relationship you want, the kind of marriage you want, it is easier to know who you should walk with. It is easy for you to realize early enough if someone is not who you should be walking or building.
So maybe there should be a shift in prayer. You can pray to God to show you exactly who you are, the kind of relationship and marriage God wants for you. So you can throw confusion away and be more focused.
Who you are determines who should walk with you.
So maybe it’s not that you haven’t found love, or you are confused about who should be, it’s just that you haven’t found yourself yet.
And when you don’t know who you are, everybody looks like a possibility. And that is when confusion sets in.
But when you do know who you are, clarity becomes your filter.
When you know these things, you stop entertaining what contradicts them.
These might be important, but don’t just focus on questions like, do they like me? Are they attractive? Do we have chemistry? Does this feel good?
Also ask questions like, does this align with who I am growing to become?
And before you ask the question above, you need to know who you are growing to become. And to know that, you need to ask yourself:
• What kind of life gives you peace. • What kind of environment drains you. • What values are non-negotiable. • What you will never shrink to accommodate. • What your purpose requires.
Can you fulfill purpose with that person? Is it easier with that person?
Is his or her vision something you can stand with him or her and pursue?
Imagine your life as a road.
Not everyone is built for your road.
That doesn’t make them wrong.
It just makes them incompatible.
When you don’t know your road, you let anyone hop in.
When you do know it, you choose carefully who gets a seat.
I also need to remind you that the anxiety you feel when you think about your relationships, is not anxiety.
You just don’t trust yourself to choose correctly.
And do you know why you don’t trust yourself?
That lack of trust comes from not knowing your own:
• Standards
• Triggers
• Emotional needs
• Long-term vision
When you trust yourself enough to choose, the anxiety disappears.
And when you know who you are, you will always recognize who can walk that road with you.
Not everyone is meant to travel with you.
But the right one will not feel like confusion.
They will feel like peace.
Also, when you know who you are and the kind of relationship and marriage God wants you to have, you can pray that God sends those kind of people to you.
You can then pray about them and choose.
𝑾𝒆𝒍𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 ‘𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑮𝒓𝒐𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑪𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒂𝒏 𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒖𝒏𝒊𝒕𝒚’. This Community deals with true, relatable stories as regards life and Christianity that enhances growth. Here, we use storytelling, articles, short letters, interview sessions and the medium of questions and answers, to share our stories as growing Christians: our strengths, challenges, weaknesses, wins, struggles. We do these to encourage each other, portray true transparent growth and to constantly remind ourselves of the saving and healing grace in Christ. Our activities are centered on growth as Christians.
