Godly Fathers of Godly Children
It is entirely my own perception, and I cannot quantify this with any solid data, but my observation of parenting practices over the years has taught me that responsibility for educating the children in godliness has been pushed to the mothers rather than the fathers. I have noted this in homes, and I have noted it in Christian assemblies. Very few fathers are engaged in biblical education of their children. Yet, scripture teaches us this:
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
– Ephesians 6:4, ESV
This directive is aimed at the fathers, not the mothers, and not the women teaching children’s Sunday School. The fathers.
Fathers … do not exasperate your children to wrath, but YOU bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. If you are a father, this is your God-given responsibility. A similar directive is found in the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church in Colossae, further emphasizing the responsibility of the father in the raising and instructing the children.
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
– Colossians 3:21, ESV
Bring them up. Raise them. It is the language of a gardener who tends to, nurtures, and cares for the plants as they grow, giving his best effort to ensure the plants flourish, are strong, healthy, and fruitful. This teaching has an even greater impact when we realize how it underscores the patriarchal structure of ancient Roman and Jewish societal family units.
Consider the emphasis of the Shema, one of the core passages in the Hebrew canon.
Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
– Deuteronomy 6:4-9, ESV
The statutes of God are to be written on our hearts and on the hearts of our children. They become the essence of who we are. The Hebrew “heart” denotes all that is at the core of human existence. It is the mind, the desire, the emotions.
The internalization of God’s commandments guides all of that. It determines our words, our thoughts, our decisions, our interactions with others. There is nothing passive about any of this. It requires great intentionality, and it falls upon the shoulders of the father to make this happen. It is the father who acts to pass God’s instructions for humanity to the next generation.
What happens when these instructions are followed?
Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers.
– Proverbs 17:6, ESV
Notice that it does not say, “Children are the pride of their parents.” That may be true. I am very proud of my own children, but is the opposite also true? My eldest son recently told me that he was proud of me. It made my heart leap and my eyes tear up a little. I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that.
The instruction of Paul, the Shema given by God, and the wisdom of Proverbs all underscore the essential role of a godly heritage in the family, and the father’s responsibility for instilling character, faith, and godly knowledge in his children.
