Love, Addams Style - The DV Walking Wounded:
When people think of The Addams Family, they usually picture kooky costumes, spooky vibes, and that finger-snapping theme song. But honestly? The real magic lies in Gomez and Morticia’s relationship. Forget roses and candlelit dinners—these two have been giving us a masterclass in love, respect, and passion since the 1930s. The Addams family started out as a cartoon in The New Yorker magazine, so that means we’ve been watching their infatuation for each other for nearly a century. I’ve been obsessed with the Addams family since I was about six years old, which was the mid-1970s.
Morticia and Gomez’s love is a whole vibe and are my relationship life goals. I think I found my favorite weirdo. He kisses my hand and smokes cigars. I’m charmed! Sadly, I’m not particularly tall or thin or voluptuous, but I’m dark and I wear black A LOT, so there’s THAT.
Respect Without Pressure
From the black-and-white TV series, through the movies and cartoons and broadway play, all the way to Netflix’s Wednesday, one thing never changes: Gomez never pressures Morticia. He doesn’t guilt her, manipulate her, or demand anything. Instead, he worships her existence. When she says no, that’s the end of the conversation—not the beginning of an argument. She is equally kind and calm about things and treats Gomez with complete love and respect. She is not rude nor abrupt…instead she’s incisive and subtle. I think Gomez likes that about her, as he’s the one in the relationship who is over-the-top and “extra.” They are definitely a balanced couple.
Morticia once coolly remarked, “Don’t torture yourself, Gomez. That’s my job.” And Gomez? He doesn’t pout, push, or protest—he just smiles at her brilliance. That’s what love should look like: mutual delight, not control.
Constant Celebration of Each Other
In the original show, Gomez often swoons when Morticia speaks French. He’ll literally drop everything to kiss her hand and murmur, “Tish, that’s French!” It’s over-the-top, sure—but it shows how much he notices her. He doesn’t treat her as background noise in his life; she’s the center of his attention.
In the 1991 film, he famously tells her, “I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss.” Extreme? Yes. But it’s a poetic exaggeration of what many relationships lack today: unapologetic devotion.
A Partnership, Not a Power Struggle
Unlike so many on-screen couples, Gomez and Morticia are equals. They parent together, plot together, and scheme together. In Netflix’s Wednesday, even when Morticia takes the lead with her daughter, Gomez stands proudly behind her, never undermining her authority. His respect is evident when he tells Wednesday, “When you were born, your mother and I made a pact with each other. To love you, and protect you, above all else.”
Notice: it wasn’t her pact or his pact—it was their pact. That’s a rare kind of unity.
Why We Love Them
The Addamses show us a version of love that’s still radical: no coercion, no manipulation, no resentment. Just a spooky, passionate, ride-or-die partnership where both people get to be fully themselves.
So, maybe we all need a little more Gomez and Morticia in our lives. Not the fog machines or the man-eating plants (though those would be cool)—but the devotion, the partnership, the respect. After all, to borrow from Gomez: “Cara Mia, you are the answer to every question.”
Final Impression: Total Respect
Recently, while watching the second season of Wednesday on Netflix, I noticed a scene (short shown below). Gomez is coming in with champagne, strutting in, in his robe, happily because he knows he is about to get lucky with his darkly gorgeous wife. “Tish?” he offers her a glass. Morticia is so entangled in the grief of her sister, that she apologizes to Gomez, stating that, “I’m sorry, mon cheri. The romantic mood has unexpectedly escaped me.” Gomez looks temporarily shocked, then smiles and winks reassuringly at her: “Maybe later.” I LOVE this. No pressure, no fight. All husbands and significant others should take a page from Gomez’s relationship playbook: not belittling or shaming your woman will get you laid sooner than later. I think THAT is sexy! Bravo, Gomez!!!
